It seems everything has just came to an end with a very concrete decision made.
My both hands were shaking and it's just hard to type on the keypad ; mind was empty while I'm trying to draft this 2 weeks ago. Now,this is the fact and everything should come to a complete full stop. Perhaps I should take this as a nice full stop for DDP & The end of the blog I believed. I will miss this...always!!!
"Heart is just so heavy, I've no idea whether this will continue with part 2 or alive one day but as everyone said... things can happen and is already happened. No one will know what will happened and what's the arrangement we will never know. All the harsh words still fresh in mind and left with deep cuts.
Nothing much can be done other than move on and let it go... as times passes by...
********
Last week of 2009, can't believed that the happiness which I had for 2 years plus gone as 09 saying goodbye. Had been fighting for the chance to solve the problem but things not working now still...Come to a blank page of my life which I had never experience before. Told myself to move on after the conversation with DDP. I thought I can and I am strong to handle myself, I believed. Without him, I feel weak it seems like the fairy tales story had come to an end and will be far away from me. Telling myself not to cry as I gonna be as strong as him if I were to follow the way he improve and perhaps his pace.
Believing in Fate? Yes, I used to believe this but now I don't know. He told that we can go so far and believe that fate arrange us together and he will never stop loving me or wanting me to worry. Promised me never leave me alone and will celebrate my birthday showering with his never ending love. Why is this happened to us and why this is just cruel to me. He can even told me that no turning back needed and he had let go 100% and move on.
Friends told me that he may have plan or switching attention to others that can light up the feeling of flame. Some even told me that you just entering to a colourful life and had tasted the new blood. I trust the one I know "you" are still you; may be I'm lying to myself, may be I'm just being naive the you now is not the one I have for the last 2 years.
Remember the last hug we had in front of the airport and that was the most heavy heart I ever had before. You promised me not think of this and we gonna be alright and will talk later but why again you broke your promise again. Along the way back from the airport, my mind keeps flipping with all the sweetest memories we had along the our relationship.
Started with a cup of Mocha>>> No Whipped under the big Green sign... We were then started the journey of sweetest and painful moments. Getting along together is the hardest thing for us and this is why I appreciated us. Singapore Trip... Bali Trip... Valentine Surprises 08, Birthday dinner arrangement, Home cooked romantic dinners, sudden appearances for 09 Valentine, most of the traveling trip and the most challenging trip for us Mount KK. Without you, I am sure I may not be able to make it... Thank you baby for all the encouragement and step by step!
My both hands were shaking and it's just hard to type on the keypad ; mind was empty while I'm trying to draft this 2 weeks ago. Now,this is the fact and everything should come to a complete full stop. Perhaps I should take this as a nice full stop for DDP & The end of the blog I believed. I will miss this...always!!!
"Heart is just so heavy, I've no idea whether this will continue with part 2 or alive one day but as everyone said... things can happen and is already happened. No one will know what will happened and what's the arrangement we will never know. All the harsh words still fresh in mind and left with deep cuts.
Nothing much can be done other than move on and let it go... as times passes by...
********
Last week of 2009, can't believed that the happiness which I had for 2 years plus gone as 09 saying goodbye. Had been fighting for the chance to solve the problem but things not working now still...Come to a blank page of my life which I had never experience before. Told myself to move on after the conversation with DDP. I thought I can and I am strong to handle myself, I believed. Without him, I feel weak it seems like the fairy tales story had come to an end and will be far away from me. Telling myself not to cry as I gonna be as strong as him if I were to follow the way he improve and perhaps his pace.
Believing in Fate? Yes, I used to believe this but now I don't know. He told that we can go so far and believe that fate arrange us together and he will never stop loving me or wanting me to worry. Promised me never leave me alone and will celebrate my birthday showering with his never ending love. Why is this happened to us and why this is just cruel to me. He can even told me that no turning back needed and he had let go 100% and move on.
Friends told me that he may have plan or switching attention to others that can light up the feeling of flame. Some even told me that you just entering to a colourful life and had tasted the new blood. I trust the one I know "you" are still you; may be I'm lying to myself, may be I'm just being naive the you now is not the one I have for the last 2 years.
Remember the last hug we had in front of the airport and that was the most heavy heart I ever had before. You promised me not think of this and we gonna be alright and will talk later but why again you broke your promise again. Along the way back from the airport, my mind keeps flipping with all the sweetest memories we had along the our relationship.
Started with a cup of Mocha>>> No Whipped under the big Green sign... We were then started the journey of sweetest and painful moments. Getting along together is the hardest thing for us and this is why I appreciated us. Singapore Trip... Bali Trip... Valentine Surprises 08, Birthday dinner arrangement, Home cooked romantic dinners, sudden appearances for 09 Valentine, most of the traveling trip and the most challenging trip for us Mount KK. Without you, I am sure I may not be able to make it... Thank you baby for all the encouragement and step by step!
It was badly hurt when you tell me all the mismatch, in a wrong timing, I’m not the right one or just the colorful life had gave you some impacts and influences. Hence you want to have a fine cut with all the cruel words and slice on my heart. Telling me to move on as you already did and the feeling of yours is not as strong as last time and you can lie to yourself that you still pretending to love me like before. Photos deleted is another sad scenario to me. No matter what, I just feel Love is love ...
Was trying hard to hold back for us, I'm so tired just so... No more strengh to hold on only on myself. I will move on and I am...
**********
2 weeks of suffering and now...
I am glad that I can now trying to complete my blog and wish to start with a new life perhaps without your shadow ... I wish this DDP Blog can always be a gallery for DDP~ Sotong & Jellyfish
I felt so thankful for those who worrying about me so much. Enough is enough, I told myself to move on like what he did. Paces could be different but thank god that I am moving.
Made a decision not to contact, message or email you could be the right solution to move faster. Was so wanted to contact you as friend that day but I didn't cause I'm moving far away from those who not love me or pretending loving me. What a co-incident that the pitying message in and corrupted half of my recovery plan.
Felt so strange that I've lost the excitement to chat... This could be a very good start... no more tears for you!
***********
To all the friends,
Especially for you~ Thank you for your encouragements and walked with me and shares my tears. Perhaps you guys are correct, future we will never know that what will happened.
Wishing him happy and be well...
Gonna start with the new blog...
Stay tune with the new Vanessa!
Was trying hard to hold back for us, I'm so tired just so... No more strengh to hold on only on myself. I will move on and I am...
**********
2 weeks of suffering and now...
I am glad that I can now trying to complete my blog and wish to start with a new life perhaps without your shadow ... I wish this DDP Blog can always be a gallery for DDP~ Sotong & Jellyfish
I felt so thankful for those who worrying about me so much. Enough is enough, I told myself to move on like what he did. Paces could be different but thank god that I am moving.
Made a decision not to contact, message or email you could be the right solution to move faster. Was so wanted to contact you as friend that day but I didn't cause I'm moving far away from those who not love me or pretending loving me. What a co-incident that the pitying message in and corrupted half of my recovery plan.
Felt so strange that I've lost the excitement to chat... This could be a very good start... no more tears for you!
***********
To all the friends,
Especially for you~ Thank you for your encouragements and walked with me and shares my tears. Perhaps you guys are correct, future we will never know that what will happened.
Wishing him happy and be well...
Gonna start with the new blog...
Stay tune with the new Vanessa!
